When I was at my heaviest weight, 186 lbs in college, my friends and family would often make comments on my body. They would usually make suggestions of different diets I should try or remind me of how much better I looked when I was thinner. I even had a college professor tell me that if I was considering a career in broadcasting I would need to lose weight because very few stations hire fat reporters…this was a female professor at an all women’s college too, so much for being open and accepting:(
By far the comments about my weight were the hardest thing to deal with, I wish I had known what to say or how to respond but I was at a total loss. This week I was reading mindful eating expert Geneen Roth’s monthly newsletter and I wanted to share her advice on weight comments. Here’s what she says…
Be polite; explain that you know they have your best interests at heart, but that someone else with more at stake has that covered: you, the boss of you. And if your friends and family aren’t as supportive (hey, it happens), remember that, to paraphrase Eleanor Roosevelt, no one can make you feel shame without your consent. You’re free to decide what you think, feel, and put in your body.
I agree. Be polite. Tell the source you know what they’re saying is coming from a place of love but that you’re working on your weight and health on your own terms, and you’d appreciate if they’d hold the comments. I bet this will stop most people right in their tracks.
I no longer diet. I don’t believe in dieting in any form. For me the only thing that works is the freedom to eat anything I want when I want. It took me three years to get to this point and a lot of comments and feeling ashamed of my weight but it has been worth it. I can finally say I no longer care what people think of my weight or how much I eat or don’t eat.
If you’re sick and tired of dieting, and if you’re like me and no diet has ever worked long term, I suggest starting to seek out and read some mindful eating practices…Here’s one of Geneen’s recent articles: How to Reach Your Natural Weight, In 7 Simple Steps.
Also, the pix at the top of this blog are me finding my natural weight over the past year and a half. When I first started mindful eating I did gain weight. The idea of being able to eat carbs at any time of the day was exciting and freeing but after awhile you will discover that you can eat when you’re hungry and stop before you’re full.