A couple of weeks ago a friend of mine forwarded this email to me from Ishita Gupta’s mailing list. I had never heard of Ishita but after reading this email I had to visit her website. She’s a confidence guider and business consultant. Her message is that you can build the exact business and life you want and be successful at it! Don’t you love knowing that?? That YOU can build exactly what you want! YES PLEASE!
Had to share the email because it struck a cord with as I’m on my journey of leaving a number one rated radio morning show to build my own TV show and brand. Hope you enjoy, Sarah
From Ishita: Early this month I spoke at two different conferences in the U.S. At TEDxDetroit, I spoke to 1200 entrepreneurs and business owners about how to rebuild after defeat. In Atlanta, I spoke to 300 women entrepreneurs about how to get out of the cycle of shame. Both events were stellar.
By the end of the week I was exhausted but happy down to my core. When I’m on stage I’m in my element. All the nerves, the storytelling, the fear, culminate into my desire to say my message out loud – I’m thrilled and terrified every time.
And while both events were great, I always look at how I got there, something I can’t help but do. I always want to know what worked and what didn’t.
The reality of how I got there was I had to stretch. Streeeeeeetch.
I had to get super uncomfortable and put myself out there not only as a leader with a message, but as someone who could deliver on stage. And I had to do it all while feeling anxious about how I would do it! I did it while running my business, working with clients, publishing the magazine, taking care of myself, spending time with family, and attending my closest friend’s weddings. It was a lot!
Se la vie, right?
The image: all summer long my speaking agent liaised on my behalf, and I connected to relevant organizations about my work. We sent many emails, made many calls, followed up, re-sent emails, called again, pitched like crazy.
It didn’t come easy, but after two months of solid effort, gigs started rolling in. It’s worth noting that during those two months, I didn’t stop stretching in other directions – I still saw new clients, expanded my practice, held workshops, and attended a bunch of social events. You gotta go somewhere to get somewhere.
Let’s deduce what worked successfully:
- I chose myself. I didn’t wait to be picked; I chose a leadership role bycreating one, not stepping into one already there. To be clear, nothing was waiting for me. I pushed like crazy because I wanted a seat at the table. Leadership doesn’t require more skills or “polishing.” You just have to respect yourself enough and want it bad. Then you make decisions with that desire in mind. It may sound trite, may even be trite, but it’s the truth. You call yourself a leader before you’re ready, pitch the deal before the details are final, call the shots when you least feel like you can.
- I made decisions. Constantly. All the time. Big and small. Pitch this organization? Do it. Send that follow-up email? Wait till Tuesday. Hold my own workshop? Schedule it. Go to the book launch? Too tired to go. Not too tired to chat with my brother. I had to make many decisions before I had all the answers. That’s what courage is – making decisions without all the answers. Obama does it every day. The only difference between me and you is my tolerance for uncomfortable decision-making.
- Every day, I stretched. Every day, I was scared. Every day, I exhaled after I hit send on emails. The reason your desire exists is because the universe is here to fulfill it. For you specifically. Sound crazy? It’s not. You can’t think the thought if you aren’t supposed to have it – it can’t exist in your mind if it isn’t supposed to be there. I am serious. You have to want it bad and you’ll get it, after stretching and getting scared and exhaling. So ask yourself how badly you want it.
- I consistently took action without worrying if something worked. I noticed if it worked, but I didn’t stress about it. It helped that I didn’t know much about the speaking circuit as then I had the freedom to approach it Ishita-style. Turns out Ishita-style is effective in building a speaking platform, but I learned this fromdoing it. It doesn’t always happen this way.
Not everything will work out for you. Even with persistence and enthusiasm, even with charm, it still won’t work. In that moment, you need to realize that your next big breakthrough is right around the corner;
You can’t stop making decisions or stretching.
Something will manifest – the deal, the client, the person you met on the street. You have to wait for it and do it without being in the doldrums.
Discomfort pays off. Next month I speak at two events I’m honored to be a part of:
1. The Conference for Women
in Philadelphia. Hillary Clinton, Madeleine Albright, and Kerry Washington are keynoting, along with other women leaders. We’re talking ladies I’m not only honored, but surprised, to share the stage with. I’m leading a workshop on fear and creativity and moderating a panel between business leaders. It goes to show: When you believe in yourself, other people have access to that same belief, but
not before you do.
It starts with you.
2. Keynoting the Asian American Women Leadership Conference
in Boston. I’m very excited about this because I’m shocked at the lack of support for women in leadership roles, especially in East and South Asia. I’m Indian and see it all the time; young women who step into unconventional leadership roles are ostracized or unsupported. To help shift our views of women here is hugely important to me.
If you’re in Philly in two weeks or in Boston next month, I hope you’ll attend. I would love to meet you. The truth is,
the more impact you want to have and more opportunities you want to create, the more uncomfortable you’re going to have to be.
You’ll have to adjust to new levels of discomfort and decision-making.
Welcome it. It means you’re growing in exactly the right way you need to.
I made the choice a few years ago to lead the movement of confidence in business and life, and I want to help every person in the world who needs to hear this message hear it. That means I’ll be uncomfortable 99% of my life but I’m okay with that. It gets easier and better each time.
To ease decision-making and give you clarity on how to make better decisions, I wrote a book to help you:
It will help you make choices when you have no idea what to do. Get in control of how you make decisions by downloading your free copy
Download your training guide and let me know if you felt more in control of your decision-making. Remember, you’ll never have to stop making decisions if you want to be a leader, so start practicing now. Click the link above to download the training guide and you’ll be taken to a page so you can start reading right away.
To choosing yourself,