Ask and Fight For What You Want and Say No to What You Don’t Want

Do you know what you really want in life? In your career? In your relationship? Do you know how to ask for it and then say no to all the distractions that keep you from having it?

IF you do, I admire you. This has been one of my greatest struggles in life. I know exactly what I want (I’ve shared most of dreams on this blog!), but I have a very hard time saying no to the things I don’t want.

That is why I was so inspired a couple of weekends ago when I took an acting class from Tom Todoroff. Tom is a world class actor and acting instructor. He’s worked with everyone from Liam Neeson to Emma Watson. Tom is INCREDIBLE! His class is like part master acting class part master life class.

He was full of life lessons from; never act in your own shoes (borrow them from a friend to better embody the character); why you should spend money on the first date (my next blog post); and of course, ask and fight for what you want and say no to what you don’t want.

Tom shared with us that some of his acting students are currently on popular TV shows that they don’t want to be on. They aren’t happy because it isn’t truly what they want. That blew me away. You would think a network TV show would be any actors dream but if it’s not what you want you would have been better off saying no. I could relate.

Tom reignited in me the reassurance to say no to the people, job offers, endorsements that aren’t getting me closer to my dream and I wanted to share that with you. I know how hard it can be to define a goal only to become side-tracked with another offer. That other offer may start out great but will ultimately leave you feeling drained and dissapointed you didn’t stay the course, believe me, I’ve been there!

Over the years I’ve said yes to numerous job offers, people, lunches, endorsements which were not what I really wanted. Drained and disappointed I would come back to the drawing board. Slowly, and with Tom’s awesome reminder I’m getting better sticking to my guns and getting more comfortable asking for what I really want.

It’s not easy for me. I’m a people pleaser and I hate to disappoint but now that I’ve launched my own podcast business I know achieving my goals depends on saying no at times. It’s great to hear someone like Tom remind us all that saying NO is important and that at the heart of your dream one simple statement has a lot to do with your success.

Ask and fight for what you want and say no to what you don’t want.

Xo, Frase

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