producer alyssa

Kellogg’s Wine and Cheez-It Combo is My New Brand

Did everyone see that Kellogg’s came out with a new House Wine/Cheez-It combo? AKA Lunchables for sad adults. I honestly feel like I can’t look the Harris Teeter cashier in the eye as I purchase this. Like she’ll somehow know that I’m about to go home, watch Ghost by myself, and cry with...

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Gwyneth Paltrow’s Orgasm Costs $75

Do we all remember when Gwyn released her coochie-scented candle a few months ago? Yeah, that shit SOLD OUT. People are into it. And I have a feeling that this orgasm-scented one she just released is going to have the same exact reception. This candle, aptly named “This Smells Like My...

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